Raam Romeo Michael Montague

A version of this was published at The Heat And Dust Project blog, because apparently I'm all about publishing multiple versions of one article now.

This time Mr Bhansali, you had me at hello. Well, almost, before you lost me at “I am Sanjay.” The moment the lilting strains of a Gujarati folksong (music is credited to the man Bhansali himself) give way to the stunning visual of a group of village belles framed in a grand gateway against the desert sun, I was prepared to forgive this movie anything. This was with almost as much certainty as a decade ago, when the opening visual of an obscenely bedecked and bejewelled Smita Jaikar hopping around in an obscenely lavish haveli told me that it was a mistake to spend money on Devdaas. Anyway.

For the first hour, Raam Leela stays pretty close to the Romeo and Juliet template and this part is marked with some clever writing and good pace. The Montagues and Capulets are introduced to us as Rajadis and Sanedas, two warring communities in a lawless village in northern Gujarat. The violence-averse playboy heir of the Rajadi clan falls for the vivacious daughter of First Family of the Sanedas in a masquerade party that is suitably substituted with a Holi party here. There is even the famous balcony scene, shot on a ridiculously pretty studio set.

Then at a crucial junction, Mr Bhansali decides he can do better than Shakespeare, and gleefully steers the story off track and into the deep dark woods of Bhansali-land. So instead of getting banished after spending one night with his Juliet, Ram-eo here elopes with Leela, then they do something, then something happens, and the story spirals out of control. Romeo and Juliet takes a turn for Godfather, the violence, which was so far chiefly played for humour, becomes very real, very brutal and very personal. At times, this feels appropriate - nobody can get mired in this endless cycle of revenge and come out whole, the film seems to tell us.

Every frame is as gorgeously mounted as you’d expect an SLB offering to be. In fact, set pieces and elements that felt overbearing and suffocating in his earlier fares, seem to work here. And there are many echoes of his earlier work. So many of the set pieces feel like Sanjay Leela Bhansali is paying a silent tribute to Sanjay Leela Bhansali, that you can make it into a drinking game. The bridge from Saawariya - bottoms up! The Ganga Ghat scene from Devdas - bottoms up! The tree over pond in a courtyard - bottoms up!

Not that I blame Sanjay Leela Bhansali for being heavily inspired by Sanjay Leela Bhansali, seeing as Sanjay Leela Bhansali is one of the very best we have right now. He has the power to transport you to a wonderland of visual delights where you won’t feel surprised to encounter an upside down tree laden with golden kiwi fruit and still somehow believe you are in a remote village in the sands of Kutch. So never mind how Navratri comes close on the heels of Holi, or why people are flying kites in October (Sankranti, the big kite festival of Gujarat, comes in January).

I must also add that of all the recent films set in Gujarat, this is the one that has captured the sounds of Gujarat most beautifully (I won’t say most realistically, for I have never been to that part of Gujarat myself). I melted into a pool of awww... when the room service guy at a cheap motel in a small town shouts “Toowaal, saabu, paaNi?” Ranveer also gets his Gujju accent and swagger pretty close. That is, for nitpickers like me who care about accents when there is so much man-cleavage and shiny man-hair on display.

The problem is that the drama here hits a crescendo one too many times. The story comes frustratingly close to a climax and instead of denouement, you find yourself at the beginning of a whole new Act. This happens over and over again, until you want everyone to shoot each other and die already.

This, of course, applies if you consider the mass of white turbans and red veils, providing the backdrop for our differently-coloured protagonists, as people. For all practical purposes, these are human props, bobbing their heads, jumping in synchrony, or dropping like flies as required by the script, nay, the choreographer. They have no more identity than the faceless storm troopers in a Star Wars movie or the blank ovals in a newspaper cartoon. Even their blood is shed, it would seem, because the splash of red provides a nice contrast on those white robes.

At one point, Ranveer does the daring thing and walks into the lioness’s den - Supriya Pathak playing the matriarch of the Saneda clan, in arguably the best role of her career - to seek an end to the centuries-long enmity between the clans. This he does by first offing more Saneda men than Mithun ever killed in the climax of his most blood-drenched revenge saga in the 90’s. Through all this, Pathak continues chanting her morning mantra, and later coolly chats with the uninvited guest. No mention is made of the dozen or more men who just died. None of them has a name.

When a woman from the Rajadi clan later taunts Pathak over the murders of men in her community, her lines fail to invoke any emotion in me. By this time, so many people have been senselessly murdered, one doesn’t care if our Raam and Leela join their ranks sooner rather than later.

Stray notes (may contain spoilers):

• For all the talk about the sizzling chemistry between our leads, they never actually do it. After kissing passionately in their first two meetings, when both of them find themselves alone inside a closed shop, they grab the opportunity by... dancing side by side like Jeetendra and Sridevi, only with better figures, costumes and choreography.
• Richa Chaddha deserves better.
• Abhimanyu Singh deserves better.
• Not only does the film trail away from the Romeo and Juliet plot, it keeps wavering close to the classic plot and swaying away. So one of the lovers hears the false rumor of the other's death, only to find the said person in their own room, alive and kicking, minutes later. 
• We also have Raza Murad playing the nominal Sarpanch, ostensibly a version the Prince from the Bard's play, only unlike the Prince, our Sarpanch doesn't do anything.
• Raza Murad deserves better.
• Since I've already mentioned Supriya Pathak performance, let me add that this fuels my grouse against the so-called 'Art' cinema of yore, where a young Ms. Pathak was a familiar face. Those realistic, gritty movies gave this talented actress nothing but simpering cameos and third or fourth leads. It took the uncompromising dramatic sensibilities of an SLB to bring the best out of her. When she throws a dark glance at one of the men surrounding her lady Don character, it is easy to see why this stout woman can make grown men pee in their pants.
• This film isn't for everybody, and it will soon prove to be one of those films that polarize both audiences and critics. Predictably, critics lavishing (not undeserved) praise have been accused of writing paid reviews, and I won't be surprised if the negative ones get panned soon.
• Speaking of negative reviews, The Vigil Idiot has surpassed himself this time. It takes a great movie to bring out the best in a brilliant critic. It's like an artist and his muse.

Plugging for friends, family and self

The sparkling young novelist and scholar, Devapriya Roy and that brainy husband of hers, Saurav Jha are finally in the process of giving shape to their labour of love, The Heat And Dust Project. The 'shape' will be of a book, about which I'll update you as soon as it is published. In the meanwhile, they have started a very interesting and eclectic blog, where I might contribute some film-related articles every once in a while. My post on a recent Marathi film Premachi Goshta is here.

The Heat And Dust Project - the book will be an account of a very interesting journey the duo took up some time ago, travelling through India on a shoestring budget. Devapriya has already written two novels - the first one, The Vague Woman's Handbook is a sweet tale of female bonding that suffers from unfair categorization into the chick-lit genre. Her second book, The Weight Loss Club - The Curious Experiments of Nancy Housing Cooperative, is sitting on my table as I type this, and you can expect a review pretty soon. You can sample some of her writing here. As you can tell, the girl needs a crash course in Short Titles.

Saurav Jha blogs and writes about defense, economics, science and other brainy stuff beyond my humble comprehension, so I'm not in a position to tell you much about him. You can read some of his articles here, or pick up his book The Upside Down Book of Nuclear Power, because though I haven't read it yet, a book with that title cannot be half bad, no?

While at IBN Live, do also check out the new blog by V K Sharma, who retired as Executive Director as RBI last year. It's called Uncluttering the Clutter, and as the name suggests, it is a to-the-point commentary on the world of Indian Banking and Finance. The blog offers refreshing clarity and an original perspective which is likely to appeal to anyone interested in more than a superficial analysis of the subject. And I swear I'm not just writing this because Mr Sharma has been kind enough to let me marry his son.

Disclaimer:
While none of the above people have bribed me to promote their books/blogs, I'm pretty open to future opportunities.

Where are the Indian Superheroes?

In one of his many, many attempts at career suicide, Shahid Kapoor did this embarrassing little film called Wah! Life Ho To Aisi in which he is killed off by Yamraj by mistake, and returns as a ghost. Amid the copious amounts of obnoxiousness in this film, there was this neat little bit thrown in where a fellow ghost played by Arshad Warsi helps him gain superpowers to help his mortal family, and the mantra he is asked to chant, turns out to be the good old Hanuman Chalisa. After all, Hanuman was the original superhero, reasons the ghost Arshad.

I was reminded of that scene while watching Krrish 3, where once again, we have tried our hand at a genre Hollywood seems to be so good at, and we have done this by totally aping everything Hollywood does. Right to the origin stories for our superheroes and supervillains. And ever since I started wondering why, the question has just been killing me. I swear it has been the most excruciating half hour of my life.

I mean, why are we even trying to explain away our heroes with magic alien mojo and our villains with rubbish like girgit ka DNA and other pseudo scientific mumbo jumbo, when we have such a vast treasure of myths and legends at our disposal? Our mythology is full of miraculous births - we have people born in pots, out of multiple wombs, out of liaisons with Gods - Kunti in Mahabharata only ever birthed half-God babies - and most of these people are born with some superpowers. Karna actually came with a built-in life jacket. Just think of all the possible superhero stories that can be created for the modern world with inspiration from these legends.

There is no dearth of super villains either. Besides ten-headed Ravana, we have the born-in-two-halves Jarasandha, the sleeping giant Kumbhakarna, the half-dozen or more demons young Krishna had to vanquish before getting to the baby-murderer Kansa... Then there is Shishupala, born with extra body parts and grown into a resentful adult. Why hasn't anyone tried to model a villain on him?

There is of course, the provision of Tapasya, a tough penance that may go on for years or decades, by the end of which an ordinary person can gain special boons from the Gods and become protectors or villains depending on their bend of mind. And then there are legends of magical springs, elixirs and divine objects that can bestow special powers on the Pure of Heart. Then there are people like Gandhari, whose great sacrifice of living with a blindfold for all those years turns her gaze into something powerful, shielding, that makes the person she sets sight upon, invincible in combat.

With so many fascinating plot devices and superpower varieties at our disposal, why do we turn to half-ass attempts to rationalize the existence of superheroes and super villains in a fantasy genre? The only films that do take inspiration from our mythology seem to be only interested in the superficial plot points, and not the characters themselves. Rajneeti, I'm looking at you. Do our writers or producers lack confidence in the tales our grandmothers told us, or have they simply forgotten the old stories?

Krrish 3: A League of Extraordinary Losers

It occurred to me after watching Krrish 3 that all the four leads - for Vivek & Kangana here are nearly as important, and arguably more interesting, than Hrithik-Priyanka - are talented people in their own right, and neither has got their dues as actors.

Hrithik Roshan - good looking to a fault and reasonably talented, very few of his films outside of dad's productions have done well enough to perch him securely on that superstar pedestal. That obnoxious giant Krrish statue in the film might as well be a metaphor for Roshan Jr's Bollywood dream. It's not like he isn't getting meaty roles - in fact, he only ever gets very meaty roles - but have you noticed that the guy is actually so good at playing ordinary, flawed, evolving guy-next-door roles? Still, other than the Akhtar siblings, everybody tends to cast him in these uber dramatic, larger-than-life characters in an attempt to make the most of his gorgeous looks. And you thought only actresses got pigeon-holed in pretty-girl roles!
Every few years, Papa Roshan has to pull up his socks and come up with yet another Hrithik vehicle, and also nudge Uncle Rajesh Roshan out of slumber for one more soundtrack, and the Hrithik boat floats for a while. But the older Roshans are getting... old now. If the insipid music in Krrish 3 is any indication, Uncle Roshan is tired. I may have been hallucinating, but I almost heard strains from Koyla in that weird song where everybody was dancing around the Mayawati-like statue of Roshan Jr. Please Hrithik Baba, let your old uncle retire in dignity and make a career on your own like a grown up man.

Priyanka Chopra - whether all that gossip about star wives conspiring against her is true, or there are just not enough good roles for the girls, but this talented actress seems to be doing only glam-doll roles of late. Not that there is anything wrong in looking that gorgeous. But unlike Kareena who keeps doing some interesting films once in a while, Priyanka seems to have regressed to doing the kind of roles up-and-coming starlets would give an arm and a leg for. In Krrish 3, she doesn't even seem interested in making the most of the few villainy bits given to her, and instead spends her screentime looking perfectly blow-dried and manicured. That her part here is imminently replaceable is underlined by scenes where she is literally replaced in the film by the shape-shifting Kaya.

Vivek Oberoi - once again, the guy shows how much acting he has in him if he only got the chance. The paraplegic scientist-genius Kaal is just the showcase for Oberoi Jr's acting chops, and he plays it with gusto, channeling the full force of his emoting abilities through is face. There is something tragically meta about the scene where he uses his whackado machinery to suck the mojo out of Hrithik to gain full mobility so he may unleash his full telekinesis powers - if only Vivek had had the opportunities Hrithik got in his career, how much more he could have achieved by now!
This just might be the turning point in Vivek's career, if he is open to playing more negative roles, because God knows we haven't had interesting villains in a while. If it wasn't for some incredibly stupid lines thrust upon him, Kaal would have become one of our most memorable super-villains yet. For now, Amjad Khan and Amrish Puri can lie peacefully in their graves, because Gabbar and Mogambo are under no threat from the guy who couldn't come up with anything more badass to say than, "I like it."

Kangana Ranaut - she showed so much promise when she first appeared on the scene, playing bold, pivotal characters in unusual stories. Somewhere along the way, the actress got typecast, ridiculed, and somehow reduced to playing forgettable roles in forgettable films. Now a superhero flick may not be the best place to exhibit emotional nuance for actresses, but it is a place to cash in on your remarkable screen presence, which is just what she does here. She digs her teeth into some truly 70's style bad girl mannerisms, and gets them just right. Also, a vamp role in such a film is the stylist's wet dream to run wild with their runway fantasies, which is just what Ms. Ranaut's stylists here do. The result is... um.. interesting.

Krrish 3 is a fun watch, I just could not hate the film the way I expected I would, and the grouses I do have with it, seem to be deliberate creative choices to keep the film easy on the brain, rather than creative negligence. Still, it is far from the best showcase for its four leads (the need for any more actors in pivotal roles is pretty much eliminated by having two of the main roles played by Roshan Jr). Each of these actors is capable of doing a lot more, a lot better and I sincerely hope to see more from each of them very soon. Hopefully without masks, metal or crotch harnesses.